


A Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows

by Yosu



Series: Danganronpa IF [2]
Category: Dangan Ronpa: Trigger Happy Havoc
Genre: Additional Warnings In Author's Note, Alternate Universe - Different protagonist (Danganronpa), Gen, Male Pronouns for Fujisaki Chihiro, Misgendering, Trans male Chihiro Fujisaki
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-16
Updated: 2020-09-01
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:21:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 6,878
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25652779
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Yosu/pseuds/Yosu
Summary: Pâro. n.the feeling that no matter what you do is always somehow wrong — as if there’s some obvious way forward that everybody else can see but you, each of them leaning back in their chair and calling out helpfully, “colder, colder, colder…”[ Danganronpa 1 AU:Chihiro is the protagonist, also a trans guy]
Series: Danganronpa IF [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1893712
Comments: 2
Kudos: 19





	1. Prologue (Agnosthesia)- Part One, "Onisim"

**Author's Note:**

> TW: mentioned transphobia

# Part 1- Onism

  1. the frustration of being stuck in just one body, that inhabits only one place at a time, which is like standing in front of the departures screen at an airport, flickering over with strange place names like other people’s passwords, each representing one more thing you’ll never get to see before you die—and all because, as the arrow on the map helpfully points out, you are here.



* * *

In front of the massive high school towers over all the other buildings in this bustling urban area. It's like the school stands at the center of the entire world.

In front of this school, which has the top students from every field imaginable. A government-funded school of ultimate privilege. 

Many say that if you come here and manage to graduate, one'll be set for life. With hundreds of years of tradition, it sends the cream of the crop into the workforce every year. It was built to raise hope in the nation's future. Which makes Hope's Peak a pretty fitting name.

There are two things you need to attend this school... one, someone would have to already be attending high school. Two, someone would have to have to be the very best at what they do. 

No _ordinary_ student could enroll here. The only way in is if one was scouted by the school itself.

And standing there at the gate, in front of the ultimate school filled with the ultimate students...

...was one named Chihiro Fujisaki.

As one can see on the outer appearance, Chihiro looked like an average young girl. 

From the short brown hair, to the very common school uniform that Chihiro wore (a long-sleeved dark green jacket, with a white shirt with a large collar with a dark green ribbon, suspenders, pleated brown skirt), to the very doll-like appearance that Chihiro had.

Society saw Chihiro as a girl. But Chihiro _wasn’t_ a girl, he simply wasn’t. No matter how hard his family pushed him into being one, no matter how hard doctors told him he was ‘born a woman’, he was a man.

...But, he was still too timid and weak to physically fight back. So, naturally, he just mentally reassured himself constantly. Because, _yes, Chihiro might be wearing a girly skirt now, but he was a man._

_He was always a man._

...Anyways.

When it came to things like _hobbies_ or _favorite things,_ Chihiro was very average. He liked popular music, tv shows, movies… or really, anything that was popular at the moment. It wasn’t like Chihiro was a mutant or a stand user, he was just a regular teenager. Although, even among regular folk, he was _the_ most regular. He wasn’t an everyday hero like most who attended Hope's Peak Academy, he was just… he was just a regular human being.

Although, it probably wasn’t the best idea to say that when he entered the classroom, especially right off the bat. In front of people who were _better than him_ , no less. It wasn’t really… the smartest idea.

Despite it, he was here. He was in front of Hope’s Peak Academy, which was nothing but regular _or_ ordinary. So it was confusing at the moment to Chihiro, whether he was or wasn’t ordinary.

He still can't believe he, the meek and ordinary _Chihiro Fujisaki,_ was standing here. In front of Hope’s Peak Academy. He wondered if someone like him could even _manage_ to survive in a place like this… in a place like Hope’s Peak Academy.

The school has this overwhelming presence, even with Chihiro just standing in front of it. Like it's trying to swallow his entire being whole. 

But it's no wonder that he would feel that way. What one would have to understand is... there was the "preparation" Chihiro did the other night to get ready for today.

Hope's Peak only invites those students who are truly elite in their field. It's such a popular topic, there are threads online dedicated to talking about the school's attendees. So to prepare, Chihiro decided to look up some of those threads. And all he saw was talk about "ultimate" students, who were way beyond your average high schooler. Beyond _him_.

For example, one incoming student is the "Ultimate Pop Sensation." Chihiro assumed that she was that high school girl, who's also the lead singer for a pop group famous all over the country.

Then there was the "Ultimate Baseball Star." Chihiro read about. A boy who was a cleanup hitter for the national high school champs. Pro teams already have their eyes on him. It would have been pretty interesting, if Chihiro knew a single _thing_ about sports.

There's the "Ultimate Fashionista." She's been on the cover of tons of fashion magazines. She's what every high school girl wants to be… so of course, Chihiro had very little interest in learning about her.

Oh, and there were multiple mentions of the "Ultimate Biker Gang Leader." The scary thing to Chihiro, that he was _the_ de facto leader of every biker gang in Japan. Gangs everywhere love the guy.

On top of that, there's the Ultimate Martial Artist, the Ultimate Fanfic Creator, the Ultimate Gambler, The Ultimate Swimming pro, the Ultimate Lucky Student (whatever that meant), the Ultimate Clairvoyant, and then some. 

Reading all about them… had made Chihiro realize how totally powerless he was in this situation. It was the country's finest, top to bottom. Chihiro was just the tame little house cat who'd wandered into a pride of lions.

But still, there was something he couldn't stop thinking about. There were a few students who Chihiro couldn't find any info on, no matter how much he looked. With all those "ultimate" students, he was the only one without any kind of worthwhile talent. Sure, he did have a talent, but that was nothing compared to some.

But then, what about those other new students who didn't seem to pop up anywhere.

Could they be just average students like Chihiro, without any real talent or anything?

That thought was kind of encouraging. He knew he didn't have much in the way of personality. But beyond that, there's an even bigger issue... 

How did such an unbelievably average student like me get picked to come to this "ultimate" high school? Chihiro guessed that there _is_ a reason... one would just have to take one glance at the acceptance letter that school sent him to see why.

_"We recently held an online poll to select one tech-oriented student to attend our school. As a result, you have been selected, and we invite you to join us as the Ultimate Programmer."_

They spelled it out plain as day-- he got invited by popular vote by tech nerds. Honestly, Chihiro probably would have been better off just declining their offer. But after his parents kept hearing about how graduating was a "guarantee for success" later in life, they wouldn’t let him just say no.

But then, actually standing there in front of the school... he started to feel lost, like he didn't belong there. Chihiro could feel himself losing my nerve.

But still… as he stood in front of the imposing school, he couldn't just stand here in front of the gate forever...

Frozen in place, murmuring to himself, he looked down at the acceptance letter clutched in his hands several times. It was like a constant reminder that he was sent here. Reading it again, it said there'd be a meeting for all incoming students in the main hall at 8 a.m. 

The meeting still isn't for a little while, since he got there at 7 a.m., but...

 _I should probably just head in._ He thought, gathering all the courage in his tiny frame -- acting like he had confidence from doing this millions of times. _Yeah... Yeah, let's do this!_

Entering the main hall, Chihiro couldn’t help but adore the fancy apparel decorating the halls. It was… quite pretty, he thought.

This is where we're supposed to meet, right? That meant Chihiro was the first person here. That was… pretty impressive, all things considered.

There's a really elegant clock over in the corner. It read... 7:10 a.m. 

The meeting doesn't start until 8 o'clock. So there's still a full 50 minutes left. It makes sense nobody else would be here yet...

God. Chihiro was so wound up with anxiety, that he got here way too early.

He had plenty of time before the meeting. Just standing around waiting isn't exactly... he should probably take a look around the school. Maybe that'll help him calm down a little. Only… a little, probably.

Chihiro breathed in and thought to himself. _I am a student here now, so there shouldn't be any problem with me having a look around, right?_ He paused, looking around, nervous. _It'll help me kill some time, if nothing else._

He looked around for a minute, glancing at the trophies and photos in the glass case until--

“What the--!?” He squeaked aloud, stumbling backwards.

His view became warped, twisted. It was some kind of delusion, melting away and mixing together into something else. Spinning, mixing, melting away, then spinning again... And the next moment...

Everything went black.

That was how it all began... And how life as he once knew it as, came to an end. At that point Chihiro should have realized...

The reason I was brought to Hope's Peak Academy wasn't because Chihiro was the ultimate programmer.

It was so he could experience ultimate despair.


	2. Prologue (Agnosthesia)- Part Two, "Altschmerz"

# Part 2- Altschmerz

  1. weariness with the same old issues that you’ve always had—the same boring flaws and anxieties you’ve been gnawing on for years, which leaves them soggy and tasteless and inert, with nothing interesting left to think about, nothing left to do but spit them out and wander off to the backyard, ready to dig up some fresher pain you might have buried long ago.



* * *

“...Nng?” Chihiro mumbled as he woke up. “Wh-What...? Where am I...?” He coughed to make it sound deeper. He always _hated_ how girly it sounded, but… that didn’t matter now.

He woke up with his head resting on top of a hard wooden desk. Chihiro’s body felt so… heavy. It was pretty abnormal for him to fall asleep in the middle of class, even if it was a boring class. But... what was he doing asleep here just now? This isn't a classroom he’s ever been in before, so, this must’ve been Hope’s Peak…?

...What the heck is going on?

He glanced around the classroom and… well, steel plates were bolted over the windows. He stood, patting his skirt down, and walked towards one of the windows. In any normal classroom, that's where a window should be. But like mentioned, it looks like some kind of metal plate has been bolted over it. And if Chihiro were to knock on it... 

_Bong, bong._ A hollow noise rang out as Chihiro hammered his fist against the hard metal.

...Definitely metal. Thick, too. Very solid.

Wait, that's not what matters here. More importantly, why are there metal plates over the windows?

It was just after 7 a.m. when Chihiro first got here. Has it really been almost an hour since then?

Chihiro glanced back at his deck. There on his desk laid a small, thin paper pamphlet. Alright, so the object on the desk is the most obvious thing he'd want to check. 

He gently examined the pamphlet, which was extremely cheap looking and handmade.

“An orientation guide...?” Chihiro read, "The next semester is about to start. Starting today, this school will be your entire world." He shook his head, and grumbled as he placed it back down. “...What the heck? Is this someone's idea of a joke?”

 _Okay, let's see. So what must’ve happened is… I got myself so wound up, I passed out in the main hall. And then someone carried me to the classroom...? If that's true it must mean... This is a classroom inside Hope's Peak._ Chihiro thought, looking around the classroom, tempted to leave immediately.

But then if _that's_ true… that just raises more questions. This is all really strange. Plus, those metal plates covering the windows... it's like it's a prison or something. None of this makes any sense.

Chihiro shook his head, realizing he should probably head back to the main hall. It's already way past the meeting time. There might be other students there now. He exited the classroom by opening the classroom, to only be greeted by a completely empty and vacant hallway.

 _Jeez... This hallway is kind of weird, too. This is getting stranger by the second. I honestly have no idea what's going on…_ He thought, glancing around.

“Well, for now I'll just head to the main hall…” He mumbled to no one in particular.

 _So I started in classroom 1-A,_ he thought, glancing around - only to see another classroom. _And that must be classroom 1-B right over here, though I probably can't enter it right now._ If anything, he should probably look around. 

He moved around the hallway, feeling uncomfortable as he glanced around. Down one hallway was...

...a _‘Despair Hotel’_...? Well, Chihiro guessed, it's probably a place for people to stay overnight. 

He shook his head quickly. He couldn’t be exploring right now! He needed to get to the main hall...!

## MAIN HALL

By the time Chihiro got back to the main hall… everyone else was already there. Well, so much for being early.

“Whoa, hey!” A girl with long, blue hair pointed out with a finger pointing at Chihiro. “Another new kid?”

“Huh? Then you all are...?” Chihiro felt a mumble come out of his mouth.

A boy with chestnut brown hair nodded. “Yeah... We're all new here. Today's supposed to be our first day of class.”

An obese male nodded. “So counting her... that makes fifteen. Seems like a good cut-off point, but I wonder if this is everyone.” _Counting her…_ that made Chihiro cringe. 

Although, it’s not like he could present masculinely without the chance of not getting bullied for being trans _or_ being a feminine guy.

Standing before him were the 'Ultimate Students' that had been hand-picked by the school. Chihiro looked around at everyone who'd gathered there, taking in their faces one at a time. Maybe he was just imagining it, but the boy swear he could feel a kind of aura coming from each of them...

“Um… what’s going on, exactly? My name's Fujisaki Chihiro. Sorry I'm late.” Chihiro mumbled, introducing himself with an awkward but polite bow. “A bunch of stuff happened, and then all of a sudden I was just… asleep.”

A fit girl gave a surprised look. “Whoa, you too?”

A gothic girl, in the far back, gave a dignified laugh. “Things just keep getting _curiouser_ and _curiouser…”_

“So strange... I declare beyond a shadow of a doubt that this is a strange situation indeed!” A large, obese male stated, placing a hand on his chin.

The girl with large, blonde hair twirled her bangs in one of her fingers. “Um...what are you talking about? I honestly have _no_ idea what's going on right now.”

“Just a moment! There's something else we must address!” A male voice rang out, making Chihiro look at the owner of said voice.

“Fujisaki-san!” A tall student in a formal student in a white uniform said sternly. “Your tardiness is unacceptable! Surely you were aware the meeting was to start at 8 a.m. sharp! To be late on your first day is unspeakable! I must report you, and you must accept your due punishment!”

A girl with giant pigtails groaned, placing her hands on her hips. “What's your problem, dude? It's not like she _wanted_ to be late. She didn't have any control over it.”

A thin, somewhat tall girl with long blue hair placed her hand up. “Everyone, please just calm down!” She paused. “Listen, why don't we all go around and introduce ourselves? I’m Maizono Say-”

“The hell!?” A guy with a pompadour snapped, cutting the thin girl off. “Now's no time for friggin' introductions!” 

The blonde girl crossed her arms. “Like, ok, maybe, but it may be good to at least find out who we all are before digging into the bigger problems here. I mean, like, how are we even supposed to talk to each other if we do not know each other's names?”

Chihiro nodded. “That's a good point…”

A boy with spiky brown hair smiled. “Okay, so let's get introductions out of the way, then we can move on to whatever else. Sounds good?”

Chihiro was still totally lost, but maybe it's best to just focus on getting to know each other for now. So Chihiro guessed that this is as good a chance as he was gonna get. Although, he already looked everyone up on that Hope's Peak Academy thread online, but... he didn’t really know what kind of people they actually are. Time to find out...

 _I'll start by talking to those five over there._ Chihiro thought, looking at the group of five students.


	3. Prologue (Agnosthesia)- Part Three, "Lilo"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: Typical Fukawa antics, also misgendering for Chihiro as usual. I swear, it gets better for him.

#  Part 3 - Lilo

  1. a friendship that can lie dormant for years only to pick right back up instantly, as if no time had passed since you last saw each other.



* * *

The girl with the blue hair smiled at the Chihiro first, waving ever so pleasantly. The way she just… _ moves  _ is positively mesmerizing. “Hi, I'm Maizono Sayaka.” And the pleasant scent the programmer can't quite place… like roses and lilies. “I look forward to getting to know you!”

**ULTIMATE POP SENSATION**

**MAIZONO SAYAKA**

_ Maizono Sayaka... _ When Chihiro saw her name in that thread online, frankly he was pretty surprised. She looked exactly like she was described as: her school uniform is a traditional seifuku-style uniform consisting of a long sleeved white shirt with a blue sailor collar and a pink ribbon bow tie with tails, a blue tartan skirt, black thigh-high socks and brown, buckled shoes. 

But, regardless of how she dressed -- Maizono-san is in a pop group famous across the country. In fact, she's their  _ lead _ singer... as the Ultimate Pop Sensation, she's in high demand to appear on TV and in magazines everywhere. But actually, that's not the only reason Chihiro was so surprised to find out she'd be going to this school. 

Because Chihiro  _ isn’t  _ into pop music, but he does like that one K-ON girl that’s popular. But… anyways, he’s pretty sure she doesn't remember, but... Well, never mind. No matter how Chihiro could look at the situation, she's really beautiful. Like,  _ Chihiro’s dream girl _ beautiful. Maizono almost was like a doll, or something.

“I'm not a doll, you know.” The popstar giggled. “I'm alive!”

Chihiro felt his face go a tint red. “Huh? Did you hear me!?” He squeaked. Which was admittedly embarrassing, sounding like that.

Maizono gave a gentle laugh, sounding like a bell. “It’s because… I'm a psychic.”

...Huh? That’s...

“...Just kidding!” She said in a jovial manner, clapping her hands together. “I just have a  _ really  _ good intuition.”

_ She's a sharp one… _ “Huh?” She chirped, eying Chihiro, which was just as uncomfortable as it sounded. “Hey, um, by any chance…”

Chihiro raised an eyebrow. “...Yes, Maizono-san…?”

“...Yeah, it must be. I'm sure of it.” She jumped in enthusiasm, almost looking like she finally got it. “Hey, Fujisaki. Did--”

“Jeez, you guys!” A boy with short, spiky black hair, large and long matching eyebrows, and intense red eyes. He wore a military-style white uniform with five golden buttons on each sleeve, a red and bronze medal above his right breast pocket. He was… intense. “How long do you plan to waste our valuable time with this ridiculous back-and-forth!?” He barked. 

Chihiro felt his body tense up. Was… was this what it felt like to be overwhelmed by someone's mere aura... ? “S-Sorry.” Chihiro mumbled. “I, uh, just got carried away, I guess…”

The boy continued. “Self-introductions are for  _ introducing yourself, _ not bumbling through a bunch of idle chit-chat!” Again, Chihiro felt like… his entire existence being threatened. Which was all that comfortable.

Chihiro felt something wet form in his eye, which he immediately wiped away. “Y-you're right… I’m sorry.” He paused to look at Maizono. “Sorry, Maizono-san... we can talk about this later.”

Even though it sounded like she really had something she wanted to say, it's not like the two’ll never see each other again. Like Chihiro just said, they could talk later.

“Anyways,” The same boy said, alerting Chihiro’s attention. “I'm Ishimaru Kiyotaka. I believe in bold simplicity! Let's work together on our educational crusade!”

**ULTIMATE MORAL COMPASS**

**ISHIMARU KIYOTAKA**

...So that would be Ishimaru Kiyotaka. According to what Chihiro saw about him on that thread... Ishimaru went to a famous private school and won top honors every year. He's  _ basically _ a flawless honor student... he's also known for the work he's done with his community's Public Morals Committee. A Lot of people say he respects rules above all else, earning him the title of Ultimate Moral Compass.

Ishimaru laughed. “Anyway, you can call me Kiyotaka. You said your name was Fujisaki Chihiro, right?”

“Um, ye-”

“Chihiro... that's a good name, a strong name! And Fujisaki is a good, strong family name!” Ishimaru said, cutting off Chihiro. Regardless, he called him… strong. That was nice. “You should thank your parents for giving you such an  _ excellent _ name! And to keep that name from losing its value, you must devote yourself every single day! Life is worth putting every ounce of effort into it!” He paused, looking at Chihiro dead in the eye. “Right? Right!”

This guy is… well, Chihiro didn’t want to be  _ mean…  _ but he was kinda annoying.

“D-do you ever shut up…?” Mumbled a girl taller than Chihiro, who had long dark purple hair that was kept in two braids behind her, grey eyes and large wire-rimmed round glasses. The girl’s outfit was a typical purple Japanese school uniform with a noticeably lengthy skirt compared to those worn by other girls here. “Oh  _ you… _ n-not that you'll remember my n-name anyway, but... I'm F-Fukawa... Fukawa Toko.”

**ULTIMATE WRITING PRODIGY**

**FUKAWA TOKO**

If Chihiro remembered correctly, Fukawa wrote a novel when she was ten, of all ages, that got everyone talking and launched her literary career. Then two years ago, she released  _ "So Lingers the Ocean," _ a love story said to be her masterpiece. The book was such a hit apparently with women that fishermen quickly shot to the top of every ‘Hottest Men’ poll.

Chihiro never read it, so he can’t say anything negative nor positive about it.

Despite her young age, she's won countless literary prizes and all her books are instant best-sellers. Which is why she's come to be known as the Ultimate Writing Prodigy. What else would you call such a young and talented author? But, to be honest, Chihiro figured she'd be a lovey-dovey type, what with her masterpiece being a romance and all...

...So why did she look so  _ homely? _

Fukawa glared at Chihiro before speaking. “Wh-What? I-It's not polite to stare, you know.”

Chihiro felt his face flush. “Oh! I’m sorry-”

“Stop staring at me like I'm some filthy creature!” She snapped, sounding... upset.

“F-Filthy creature?” Chihiro repeated, feeling horrified at just saying that. Chihiro was a gentle boy, so he never would insult a person -- no less a person that looked as shy as him. “No, I just thought--”

Fukawa looked pissed, which wasn’t a pleasant thing to see. “I-I know what you ‘just’ thought...!” She snapped. “You just thought you've n-never seen such an  _ ugly woman. _ You just th-thought it was  _ sooo  _ funny...!”

“N-No, that's not what I was thinking at all…!” Chihiro squeaked, stepping back. 

Fukawa balled her hands into fists, looking disgusted at Chihiro. Which was… uncomfortable. “Don't bother trying to l-lie to me! I know it's true. Otherwise, you... I know you can't stand looking at me!” She groaned. “Wh-whatever, I don't really  _ care. _ I'm used to it.”

Talk about an inferiority complex. Which was telling coming from Chihiro, who himself had an inferiority complex. But… he was way off about what a successful author would be like.

“Yo! Leave her alone!”  _ Her,  _ the boy said _.  _ That made Chihiro mentally cringe. “Oh, Fujisaki-san, the name's Kuwata Leon. What's up?” He -- Kuwata -- had dyed orange spiked hair, a goatee, and pale blue eyes. He wore a white blazer jacket with a popped collar, a white shirt with a red grunge skull design, dark blue jeans, and white platform shoes with a black sole. He accessorized with a padlock chain necklace, two overlapping studded belts, rings, and an oversized safety pin on his lapel. He has several piercings.

He was… pretty intense, like Ishimaru.

**ULTIMATE BASE-BALL STAR**

**KUWATA LEON**

Chihiro immediately recognized that name. Kuwata played for the national high school champs as their cleanup hitter. The Ultimate Baseball Star... And that superb athletic specimen is...

“...You? Seriously?” Chihiro mumbled under his breath, which he then immediately embarrassed. “I’m sorry…!”

“Huh?” Kuwata crossed his arms. “Something wrong?”

Chihiro blushed, glancing away from the redhead. “N-nothing, I'm sorry, I’m just…” The programmer paused, “...surprised. I figured with you being the Ultimate Baseball Star and all…”

The taller boy sighed. “...What, were you expecting some  _ kid  _ with a shaved head?”

_ Shaved head...? _ Chihiro shook his head. “No, I was just expecting more of a, you know, sporty-looking traditional baseball player type.” He collapsed his hands together, feeling uncomfortable. “I mean, when I found that article and picture of you online, that's how you looked  _ then…” _

“What!? Aw man, you found that picture of me playing baseball?” Kuwata groaned, looking embarrassed. “Seriously!? I hate that picture! This is not cool. This is SO not cool... Seriously, I'm like, mega embarrassed right now.”

Chihiro felt his hands, still laced together, falling to his skirt, bumping against the fabric. “I’m… really sorry about that…”

“I didn't have a choice, okay? Shaving your head like  _ that  _ is part of national championship regulations!” Kuwata continued, making Chihiro feel… worse about bringing it up. “But now I  _ refuse _ to cut my hair.”  _ Wow, he’s just like me! Well, in reverse.  _ “And I'm not gonna dye it back to normal either! Actually, can I be totally honest with you? I don't like baseball. Like,  _ at all. _ I've never gone to a single practice.”

Chihiro gave an awkward smile. He's never practiced... and he was still his team's star player? He's some kind of prodigy… 

Kuwata smiled. “...And as soon as I got accepted here, I  _ quit _ baseball for good! I have my own dream for the future!”

“A dream… for the future?” Chihiro repeated.

“My only path in life is getting into music! You can feel that star-quality aura I have, right? I'm gonna be a singer, so all I need is a songwriter and someone on guitar, and we're set! This new version of me that's chasing after my dream is, like…” Kuwata paused to smile, stretching his arm out, “super cool to the max!”

Chihiro couldn’t believe what he was hearing. Never in his life, he would have never imagined he’d hear something like that from a baseball all-star…

That left the last person in the area, who was an overweight figure, with large hands, thin legs, and a face that comically resembles a hamster. It was a bit… cute, Chihiro thought. He had short black hair that ends with curled points against his cheeks and forehead and a small pointed ahoge.

He wore a pair of black, thick-rimmed glasses. He is dressed in a white button-down shirt, an orange tie which has a patterned vertical double-headed blue arrow design, a pair of dark gray trousers, and grey trainers. Over his shirt was a light grey, unbuttoned cardigan and on his back was an orange backpack.

“It seems that you’ve finally noticed me!” The boy said in a… high pitched voice. “I… am Yamada Hifumi. But if you want to call me by my nickname,  _ ‘The Alpha and the Omega!’... _ I don't mind.” Yamada introduced, his voice suddenly sounding grandiose.

**ULTIMATE FANFIC CREATOR**

**YAMADA HIFUMI**

“By the way, Fujisaki-dono, how much do you know about the world of 2D art?” Yamada began. “You look like you would be aware of it, an otaku yourself.”

_ An… otaku? Was it because I’m a programmer? A… programming otaku…?  _ “World of...2D?” Chihiro repeated.

Yamada sighed. “Well, in that world, I am well known and supremely well regarded as the  **Ultimate Fanfic Creator** .” Yamada paused, to push his glasses up, as they were slipping off the bridge of his nose. “I once sold 10,000 copies of one of my fan comics at a school festival. The event has passed into legend... some of them didn't get it, of course, saying I'd  _ ‘tainted’ _ the event. How stupid can you  _ be!?” _

_ That's too bad about them. But selling 10,000 copies like that is definitely pretty remarkable. _ Chihiro thought. “Well, I wouldn’t call them that…” Chihiro mumbled, again, the boy was unable to say a cruel thing about a person -- that included people he didn’t know, like the people Yamada talked about. 

Yamada laughed. “The words of such idiots mean nothing to me. I am like Van Gogh--utterly underappreciated in my time. I am a soldier, serving night and day to destroy all mindless preconceptions about fan fiction.” He explained, looking… well, intense, but in a comically ironic way compared to Ishimaru and Kuwata. “I'm sure if you were to observe my work, Fujisaki-dono, you would comprehend its greatness immediately. For my work is filled with deepest meaning…”

_...Fujisaki-dono… -dono was a pretty genderless honorific, right? Way better than -chan... _

But… regardless… Chihiro titled his head. “Um, what...what kind of meaning?” He mumbled, looking at Yamada.

“...It's about embracing our basest urges!” Yamada said, making Chihiro blush at the implications. Did Yamada mean it… in that  _ way…? _

_ I don't think I want to comprehend it… _

_...I should talk to those five, over there, to take my mind off of… that stuff. _


	4. Prologue (Agnosthesia)- Part Four, "Flashover"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: The typical. Misgendering and Chihiro thinking he'll get killed. Not fun.

# Part 4 - Flashover

  1. the moment a conversation becomes real and alive, which occurs when a spark of trust shorts out the delicate circuits you keep insulated under layers of irony, momentarily grounding the static emotional charge you’ve built up through decades of friction with the world.



* * *

The first boy that Chihiro saw was a boy that had spiky, desaturated brown hair with a prominent _ahoge,_ and washed-out hazel eyes. He wore a zipped-up dull green hoodie with a red stripe along the zipper, an open black jacket with gold buttons over the hoodie, black jeans, and red sneakers with white toes.

He laughed. “Um, I’m sorry… I didn’t catch your name. What was it again?”

“Hello, nice to meet you. I'm Fujisaki Chihiro…” Chihiro bowed, awkwardly. “And, um you are? Sorry, I get kinda embarrassed whenever I introduce myself like this…”

The boy gave a friendly smile. “I’m Naegi Makoto.” He paused. “I’m the Ultimate Lucky Student, although I guess that doesn’t mean much.”

**ULTIMATE LUCKY STUDENT**

**NAEGI MAKOTO**

Ultimate Lucky Student… that meant Naegi got in via a lottery, which was impressive given how many _people_ were in Japan.

...Other than that, there wasn’t much to Naegi that was online. From the threads Chihiro has read, hee was just an average teenage boy. He had a nuclear family (consisting of his mother, father, and a younger sister). He was… as typical as typical could get. 

But that meant he was approachable compared to everyone at Hopes’ Peak. Which was… _a good thing,_ Chihiro thought.

“Anyway, I hope we can get along…” Chihiro mumbled. “It’s uh… nice to meet you.”

Naegi smiled. “Same here.” Naegi paused, almost… mid thought. “...Huh? Maybe it's just my imagination, but… have we _met_ before?”

 _‘Have we met before…?’_ That was a weird question. “Um, I don't think so. We just met for the first time.” Chihiro answered. “...Which is why I said ‘nice to meet you’.”

The lucky student gave an affirmative nod. “Oh, yeah. Good point.” A pause. “Sorry.”

Chihiro felt his body freeze up. “Y-You don't have to apologize for that.” He felt his eyes well up in tears. _Darn it! Why am I... tearing up…?_

“Oh, yeah…” Naegi mumbled, uncomfortably. Before staring off into space for a moment.

“Hey, so listen…” Chihiro felt his face flush up, trying to suppress a tear. “...I-I'm really... sorry.” _Stop crying…!_

Naegi tilted his head. “Huh? What are you apologizing for?”

Chihiro sniffled, rubbing his eyes to try and stop crying. “Well, just cuz… you seem upset. You must be mad at me for being , right?”

Naegi gave a horrified look. “No, not at all! I was just lost in thought about something.” He explained, holding his hands out in front of him.

“Huh? Lost in thought...?” Chihiro repeated.

Yeah! It had nothing to do with me being upset or anything.

“Oh, that's good. I was afraid maybe you didn't like me.” He said, along with a relieved sigh. “Hehe... I'm glad!”

Chihiro’s eyes darted at the… most imposing, most masculine guy in the room. 

He had slightly tanned skin and a tall, muscular build which gave him a bulky figure. He had his hair as a dark-brown punch perm with a styled-1960s pompadour. He has a deep-ridged black eye-line circling his purple eyes, which gives him an intimidating appearance.

The boy’s outfit was that of a typical Japanese biker gang member, consisting of a high-collared black long overcoat worn open over a white t-shirt. He wore baggy black pants held up by a belt and his shoes were white loafers. The buckle on his belt is shaped like the face of a _Komainu_. 

He was… really imposing and… really tall.

“Oi. Midget.” _Midget? Better than being called a little girl, or something._ “Name's Mondo Owada. Nice to fuckin' meetcha.”

**ULTIMATE BIKER GANG LEADER**

**OWADA MONDO**

He was… Owada Mondo, huh? Which means...

...Which means that _he_ , _Owada,_ was the current leader of the largest biker gang in Japan. He's earned respect, every awe, from every gang in the country. Which was probably why he was the Ultimate Biker Gang Leader.

“...Umm…” Chihiro mumbled out, he voice cracking. “Nice to... meet you, too.”

Owada laughed, giving Chihiro a thumbs up. “Hell yeah!”

Chihiro… better be careful around him. One wrong word, or move, or _anything…_ and Chihiro could get a dumbbell slammed in his skull. Which was… not a comfortable thought or idea.

Suddenly, Chihiro felt a hand plop on his head, making him turn around immediately. The hand belonged to a girl with a tall hourglass figure, light blue eyes, and long, thick, bleached strawberry blonde hair tied in two twin pigtails, which was held up by a set hair ties: a cute rabbit and a large red and white bow.

She wore a black cardigan over a white dress shirt (with both left open to expose the top of her black-and-red bra) and a red pleated miniskirt, along with mid-sized black boots that had platform heels and red laces. Her tie had a dot-patterned. 

“Hiii, Fujisaki-kun! I'm Enoshima Junko. _Charmed,_ I'm sure!” _She called me… -kun. That was… nice._

**ULTIMATE GAL**

**ENOSHIMA JUNKO**

Anybody -- at least any guy, which included Chihiro -- would recognize this girl, with that name...

She's got more charm and presence than any high school girl in the country. She's the Ultimate Fashionista. Chihiro had seen her on tons of magazine covers, but… here, she had freckles, and… a smaller bust… but...

...“I feel like that doesn't quite match up to reality.” Chihiro blurted.

_...Why would I say that out loud!? Am I dumb!?_

“Huh...?” Enoshima squeaked, making a surprised noise. “Oh, are you talking about my cover photos and junk? Ahaha, well of course! Those are totally photoshopped.”

Chihiro tilted his head. “...Photoshopped?”

“Yeah, you know--edited to hell and back. With like, computers and junk?

"..Oh, so they aren't real...?"

The fashion model groaned. "Come on, don't act so surprised! You're gonna make me all like, super depressed and junk." Enoshima then paused, to glanced at her cherry pink nails before looking at Chihiro again. "It's totally normal these days to photoshop the crap out of cover photos. If you're surprised by that, you'd be totally blown away by a certain dangerous little diva of ours…" Was... Enoshima talking about Sayaka...? "They make the eyes and junk super big, and tweak the skin so it looks all ceramic and porcelain."

"Oh..."

_...So many dreams are getting crushed today, including mine…_

Chihiro's vision and attention was then caught by a girl with a lean but curvaceous build. 

She had brown skin, blue eyes, and wore her brown hair in a very high curled ponytail accessorized with a paperclip-style barrette. Interestingly, she wore Hope's Peak Academy-branded blue dolphin hotpants and green sneakers, a white tank top, and a red tracksuit jacket with white piping. 

She also wore knee-length white socks, a red knee brace over her right knee, a band-aid on her left knee.

She waved, with a smile on her face. “Heya! I'm Asahina Aoi! But my friends just call me Asahina.” She lowered her hand. “...'Sup?”

**ULTIMATE SWIMMING PRO**

**ASAHINA AOI**

_Asahina Aoi..._ She's been breaking records in every competition she's been in since elementary school. She's even been chosen as an upcoming Olympic cadet. She is, without a doubt, the Ultimate Swimming Pro. 

The combination of her ability, appearance, and, um... _proportions_ has been widely discussed online. He felt a little bad, being near her now, after reading some of the… _things_ people have said about her.

Guys can be… pretty disgusting around girls.

She blushed. “So uh… what was your name again? Sorry, totally forgot!”

 _Were Ultimates this flakey…?_ “I’m Fujisaki Chihiro.” He answered, awkwardly, trying to hide his… well, embarrassment. Her chest was… pretty, uh… nevermind.

She fist pumped. "Oh yeah, I knew it was something like that!"

 _No, not ‘something’ like that. It is that…_ “Oh, uh, my first name is Chihiro, my last name is Fujisaki…”

"Sure, sure, got it! Here, I'll hammer it into my brain right now!” She then began to just... keep repeating his name and moving her finger across her palm like she was writing something… were girls always this weird…?

“Chihiro… Fujisaki... Chihiro… Fujisaki…”

Chihiro tilted his head. “Um… what are you doing?

“You don't know?” Aoi asked, continuing to ‘write’ into her palm. “If you wanna remember someone's name, you gotta write it on your hand three times!”

 _I've never heard of that before in my life…_ Chihiro thought. If this was one of those animes his dad watched, there would be a comically sized sweat drop on his head. Something like that.

Aoi suddenly gave a sheepish smile. “Hey, by the way...how do you spell your last name?”

 _Is she talking about Fujisaki?_ Chihiro thought, before sighing. “Um, Asahina-san, you spell it exactly like it sounds.”

The swimmer laughed, awkwardly. “Umm...... well, I have no idea. Hahaha!” A pause. “I'll just figure it out later and write it down. Anyway, glad to meet ya, Fujisaki!”

"S-Sure, same here..." _Well, one thing I learned is she's totally easygoing and bursting with energy._

Chihiro saw one of the other girls in the corner of his eye, standing there… like a ghost, which spooked him a little bit. She had purple eyes and a pale complexion. She wore her long lavender hair down with a single braid on her left side, tied with a black ribbon.

Her outfit consisted of a dark purple collared blazer jacket with six brown buttons over a zipped up long-sleeved white blouse and brown tie. She also wore a black short skirt, heeled knee-high purple boots with equally knee-high light purple socks. Barely noticeably, was the custom-made black studded gloves that she wore.

Chihiro stumbled over to her, her aura was… mysterious. But still, he nearly leaned into her.

“...Um... Can I ask you your name?”

She sighed deeply. “...My name is… Kirigiri Kyouko.”

**ULTIMATE ???**

**KIRIGIRI KYOUKO**

_She's... pretty tight-lipped, huh?_ Oh but… Chihiro realized her name (Kyouko Kirigiri) didn't show up anywhere in that Hope's Peak Academy thread. And he did see that there were students like him... ones who didn't have any real identity or presence. Could this girl be one of them...?

Chihiro sheepishly opened his mouth. “Um, s-so...what are you doing at this school?”

“What's that supposed to mean?” Kirigiri said curtly, no emotion in her monotone and deep voice.

“I’m sorry!” Chihiro squeaked. “No, I just meant... Getting invited here means you're some kind of ‘ultimate’ something, right? So... what ultimate are you?”

Kirigiri’s stone cold face didn’t change. “...Why should I tell you?”

Chihiro laced his fingers together, clutching them close to his chest. “Huh...? I’m sorry…” He paused, to keep his emotions in check. “I guess you don't _have_ to tell me.”

“No, I don't _have_ to tell you.” Kirigiri agreed. “So I'm not going to.”

Nothing about her turned up online, so Chihiro was thinking _maybe_ she got picked by chance like Makoto or himself, but… 

_Kirigiri’s face is like an iron mask. And if she doesn't want to tell me anything, there’s no point in asking._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Speaking of ahoge... Chihiro has one in this fic, although it's like Miu's (two them and they look like rabbit ears)
> 
> Also, slight spoilers I guess(?) but Junko will get a lot of attention in the fic. She's a good girl.

**Author's Note:**

> Chihiro is a transgender male in this, please respect his pronouns in the comments.


End file.
